To whom it may concern (i.e. Heavenly Father, Jesus, God, etc.)
I know it’s been awhile and I’m sorry about that. It’s just that when you let Kate Gosselin make it through six weeks of eliminations, my faith began to wane. Kidding! You know I like to open my prayers on a light note.
I’m sure You are aware of all that’s been going on lately. What with the volatile stock market, housing crisis and Kim Kardashian’s wedding, it’s been pretty tough on all of us financially. (Except for those Kardashians who seem to be the leaders of a new crowd making a fortune by being famous for absolutely NOTHING!)
Now I’m not saying we don’t deserve a little hardship. It was the greed wasn’t it? Or was it how we all tried to buy our way into modern day salvation with fancy cars, obnoxious housing, expensive vacations and ‘questionable’ Facebook relationships? We didn’t worry about money. Nope, we just worried about the other ‘M’ word; MORE. Nobody noticed our worry though. How could they when Botox erased any hint of emotion?
It wasn’t just the rich either. Each and every class experienced their own form of over indulgence. And just about all of us have been affected by foreclosures, bankruptcy and reality television. (I mean seriously, what is going on with TV programming? Thank God – or You, rather for Modern Family. If I have to watch another preview of, So You Think You Can Dance With The Real Housewives of Nutbush, I’m going to scream… Then of course I’ll DVR it because who would want to miss a show like that?)
So back to my prayer, God. Part of me would like to say, ‘enough already! Bring back a strong housing market, honest politicians, a thriving stock market and John F. Kennedy Jr!’ But then where would the lesson be? Truth is, the boom of housing was a lie created by dishonest people. So instead of that, I’ll just settle for a market that allows a family to live in a home they can afford, not necessarily own. The politician thing is probably a moot point since we are supposed to keep you two-You (God) and Them (politicians) – separate. But, I will say this, maybe you can just help us be more mindful of criticisms we make about our leaders. One person didn’t cause the mess we seem to be in now and one person can’t save us from it either. And help those politicians remember they probably got into politics to make a change not capture more votes. It takes a village, geez! I get it that the stock market is unpredictable. But something needs to be done about that irritatingly buzzed out trading floor. No wonder traders have high blood pressure and high divorce rates. And I’m keenly aware that me and John-John were never meant to be. That was added for dramatic effect.
Before closing, I’d like to say thank you for everything. Because in spite of it all, bad TV, depleting bank accounts and a mother-in-law who lives next door, I am very happy with all You’ve given me, except for the stretch marks… that was just mean. It feels a little weird saying this to the Almighty but, good job!
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