Kids are watching…


Sep 27, 2016
Angel Kane - Kane & Crowell Family Law Center

By Becky Andrews


I’ve done it. More than likely, you have too. It happens all the time. Now, thanks to social media, the damage is done before you can change your profile photo.
Moments after I’ve given myself judge and jury power concerning something someone else has done, I can feel the karmic shift commence.

The scenarios can be different but the retribution will be the same. Payback.

When you feel the need, avoid saying it in front of an audience. More important than that I beg of you, DO NOT post your feelings on social media as this will yield an even larger audience to witness those words when they inevitably come back to bite you. People will forget many things about you. They will forget your name. They will forget your birthday. They will even forget you have two kids. But they will NEVER, EVER forget what you post on Twitter, Facebook, Tumbler, Instagram, etc. Especially if it makes you look like a judgmental little twit.

Worse than being a judgmental little twit is feeding the beast. For instance, I know it’s better to ignore obnoxious, aggressive and embarrassing posts, but instead I soak it in. Reading over and over to anyone that will listen. Mostly just fascinated by how a human being could post something so aggressively unappealing.

In addition to starving the beast, here’s a couple social media behaviors that need attention.

Stop saying and/or posting:
“My kids would/will never… have potty training accidents, eat chocolate for breakfast, curse, talk back to me, cheat on a test, sneak out of the house, and lie about cheating on a test or sneaking out of the house.” The list can go on and on.

Our kids are amazing. They are smart, lovely creatures. They are also human. This means, they will make mistakes. Some small, like not finishing homework. Some big, like underage drinking.

Before tempting fate and discussing how your superior parenting ensures little Timmy or Tonya will never do anything short of perfection, stop and think about getting a phone call that contradicts everything you thought about little Timmy or Tonya. Instead of gossiping and sharing your opinion with 1,500 people you don’t really know, talk to your kids. Your opinion will count more at home.

Now let’s talk about another scenario that is pretty common in towns across the US. That’s the mindless and sometimes gleeful sharing of another’s misfortune. Before looking (then laughing) at photos on your mug shot app or playing the role of town crier to inform everyone about whose home is in foreclosure, who just filed for divorce, or who is having an affair, this is probably the best time to bone up on the laws of karma or reaping what you sow.

We share inspirational idioms, prayers and photos freely.  We want to raise strong daughters and respectful men. We want to be a part of making the world a better place to live. But until those “wants” become “needs,” in the eyes of our children, we are acting just like the mean girls and boys we tell our kids to stay away from.


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